January, the month of faithfulness

This might come as a shock to many people but for the month of January, I Big mama, have existed happily with only one guy. The fact that this man who has single-handedly managed to make me happy has been none other than Q might still surprise a few souls. Anyway, as i recount the happenings on the last day of this month, I must say I'm extremely satisfied with my decision.

Q has been an anchor when I was feeling down, he listened when i needed to talk, offered me useful advice when i needed it but most of all, he made beautiful love to me during this month. Already, Ive made plans to spend the evening with him at our favourite comedy night despite it being a day after the Biker's birthday which I'd all but forgotten.

This should not be difficult to envisage considering that I've spoken with the Biker just twice since this year begun. After I ushered in the new year with the Biker (night prayers on the 31st), I proceeded to do the same with Q (Lovemaking on the 1st) and have since not regretted my decision. I've not been on talking terms with the Biker following a fall out in which I proposed that we remain "friends without benefits." He's not taken too kindly to my suggestion and we resorted to communicating by text.

As for K, the ex and everyone else, all I can say is that their timing surely sucks. Just when I'm living this blissful life with Q, they are all pressurising me to spare some time for them. As we enter February, all I can say is that I have big plans in maintaining the status quo seeing as it has only brought me happiness.

Recap of the year 2007

Alot happened in the year 2007 but If i am to say so myself, most of it was good despite the fact that the year had begun on a sad note in which i lost my dad. Anyway, like most strong people, i recovered and quickly picked up the pieces of my shattered life.

All in all, I am still with the Biker, had a disastrous night out with the Arabian prince that culminated into a near arrest by the traffic police, I cut all contact with K till furthur notice, rekindled my love with the Ex and Q.

2007 Year end Summary:

No. of boyfriends = 0

No. of new exciting males that i met in 2007 = 3

No. of Arab guys I did the hanky panky with = 1

No. of people I almost fell in love with = 3

No. of people that will still be in my life in the new year = 4

No. of committed relationships = 0

Not bad for a true player, don't you agree!!!

Can't quit fighting!

I'm not sure what has brought this on but me and the Biker are experiencing some rough patch in our relationship. We are always going off at each other ad the accusations that I am selfish and he's inconsiderate are just becoming a constant in our interactions.

I'm now easily ticked off that we have postponed any kind of lovemaking simply because it wouldn't feel right. I'd so looked forward to my siblings giving us some space but as soon as they left, we fell into this quarelling rythm that has brought on a new reality that is my character!

Many friends and people i know usually say they've never seen me angry and they can't help asking me what my secret to a positive attitude is. Now, I'm not sure I can be the one to speak for such positive souls and I can only blame it on the Biker and the ideal world that his initial attentiveness promised me. I can't say he's changed much but i'm constantly finding fault with him and his actions. In the meantime, Q is still at his best. I enjoy his company even more and I'm tempted to let him be the one that deflowers me after this prolonged sexual limbo.

Tonight is the night that will help me determine this. I have a choice to either hurry home to the Biker or to spend an evening of comic relief with Q at the Comedy night. I'll keep you posted on what i finally decide.

Ebola dampens my holiday cheer

Its that time of the year when everyone is feeling festive. My siblings are back from school and we were so looking forward to the holidays when the Ebola virus dampened our mood. I can't help feeling scared that the deadly virus could attack me. As such, i'm taking the necessary precautions not to contract it.

As one of my preventive measures, I've cut out all association with the likes of K and all other casual friends. I plan to limit my interactions to the Biker, Q and maybe the Arab prince. He has earned his position on this last by virtue of being a new entrant. At the moment, we are still communicating electronically but he should know that keeping in touch is not one of my strong points. I honestly prefer being touched instead.

Anyways, my siblings left my crib this morning for a visit to my granny. I am now as free as a bird to engage in activiites for the elderly before i embark on my mini holiday gateaway plans. Till next time, i remain yours in truth,

Big mama

Romance to blossom after CHOGM

I'm not sure how I know this but after the hectic CHOGM break, I can't help but feel that romance has set in for me. The pointers have mainly come from discovering that my body is producing more and more pheromones than usual. Well, for those of you who do not know what they are, you'll learn that they are the chemical compounds produced by our bodies to attract and influence the sexual behaviour of the opposite sex. How do I know this, many of you might ask? The answer is simple; judging by the attention i'm receiving lately, I can't help but confirm my suspicions.

While still on the issue of pheromones, I've recently added a brand new Arab guy to my club of "men who are interested in me". I can't help feeling good about this since he's really cute and by the admission of his email address, he's a prince! We've all dreamt of being treated like princesses but for me, this is a journey i will partake without a second thought.

As for the Biker and Q, I finally set it up so they could meet each other. My simple rule has always been that the new entrant gets to know about the incumbent while the incumbent gets to meet the new guy as a friend. I must confess that it was more exciting than I'd anticipated. Q ended up admiring the Biker's bike and test rode it after i prompted him to do so. Since that day, the Biker is careful to ask if Q will be at any of our dates and Q is just the least bit suspicious of the Biker's intentions.

The weekend that was!

I started off the weekend by borrowing countless movies from the video library near my crib on Friday evening. I decided against going out and opted to stay in with the Biker. The night was proving to be ordinary when my phone went off. For some reason, i forgot to turn it off and it was the ex from Bagdad on the other line. Because of my loud ringtone, the Biker and I woke up and he could not help listening in on my conversation. I tried to respond to all the ex's jokes and anecdotes with monosyllabic answers. The importance of this was not lost on the Biker. After an uncomfortable seven minutes, I told the ex that he'd woken me up and would have to call me during the day so we could talk at length. He guessed that I was up to no good because shortly after hanging up, he sent me a text that was heavy with sarcasm about why I had chased him off the phone. Anyway in order for me to quell the situation, i promptly turned off my phone and was then given the third degree by the Biker who had gotten curious as to why I wasn't speaking freely with my late night caller.

On saturday, i figured that it would be wise if i left my schedule open to allow me time to recover from the bad blood that was brewing around me. One of my toy boys chose this night to call and wanted to invite himself over. I made some excuse as to why I couldn't see him because i never wanted to take any chances of getting caught in my game.

I woke up on sunday in a brighter mood and decided to wash and roll my hair. I was impressed with the final results. I left for a CHOGM meeting at the Sheraton and prayed that the rain would subside so I could join Q and his buddies for lunch. The meeting went on until about 4.00pm when i rode to Naalya to meet Q. As luck would have it, his buddies had left for other engagements giving us time to enjoy each other's exclusive company. Being a Sunday, i never intended to drink too much but i found Q's company very relaxing that i just kept going on and on.

At about 11.00pm, we decided to call it a night and since we were in Naalya, the nearest place to rest for the night was Q's crib in Kiwatule. We were both too wasted when we got home that we relegated all matters of intimacy to the wee hours of the morning. We were both feeling very revitalised this morning when we got down to the hanky panky. My mind is now extremely alert and i guess I will be able to accomplish a number of my deliverables that have been pending due to my luck of inspiration. If I am ever to head the Human resource team of any organisation, i will stress the imporatance of our worker's fulfilment of conjugal rights because I'm a strong believer in their impact on one's performance.

Now I must wait to hear from the Biker. Hopefully, he's gotten over his jealousy.

Dejavu

As i rode to work this morning, I was confronted by a scene so familiar I couldn't help feeling like it was a set up. Today I met a biker at exactly the same spot along the Jinja road traffic controls where I'd met "the Biker." Amazingly he was riding a similar bike and I must confess he did look hotter than the current Biker.

I tried to dodge through the traffic but he pulled up next to me and complimented me on the fact that I was a female rider. If it had not been for the different date, I'd have sworn I was dreaming of what had happened on the day i met the Biker.

He tried to engage me in small talk about where I'd bought my rodeo bags and he said he liked my bike. I found this statement faulty considering that he was riding a beautiful Honda Shadow that looked exactly like the one the Biker recently sold off. I deliberately refused to volunteer any information about myself and let the opportunity to get to know him pass me by. I am however convinced that my big excitement is drawing closer especially after spending a long uneventful night with the Biker.

Pondering my next move

Just when i thought my boring day couldn't get any worse, I was asked to attend a meeting with some scholars in the evening. Q's call asking me to be his date at the comedy night was timely. I however couldn't join him until about 10.00pm. I watched about three skits and then proceeded with his buddies to the bar.

All this time, I'd not heard from the Biker and had also made no attempts to communicate to him. At about 11.00pm, he sent me a message wondering where i was and what I was up to. I ignored this message for about an hour when I replied saying I'd call him on getting home.

After getting wasted with Q, i was in a happy mood when i finally called the Biker. He told me he had been up watching a movie while waiting for my call. I decided to spare him the detail of having been with Q all this time. He had the nerve to question me about why I'd gotten home late and i begun to wonder whether I'd allowed him too many liberties.

He told me how he is looking forward to spending time with me tonight and yet Q had said the same thing as I bade him farewell last night. I'm now torn between a night out at the Rugby Club with Q or a night in at home with the Biker. My mind has not been made up yet and I guess my final decision will be determined by the better gambler who will call me first.

Feelings of detachment

I don't know whom or what to blame for my current state of affairs. Just when I'd started basking in the feeling of belonging that came with seeing the Biker almost everyday, it has suddenly lost its appeal. I am now back to this place where my heart is craving for a little excitement. I must confess that I hate routine, a fact that convinced me that I would never make a marriage work. How is one supposed to go through life with a mate when the mate suddenly becomes boring? I think marriage and all it represents is torture that stems from self -confinement as soon as one says "I do".

After a prolonged silence yesterday, I called up the Biker and lied about how much I'd missed him just so he would not question me about my shenanigans of the previous night. He sounded pleased by my call and promised to see me later in the evening. By the time he got home, I'd already showered. We made small talk and he seemed disinterested in the Bob Marley documentary that I'd rushed home to watch. I was not amused by the fact that he couldn't care less about the Raggae legend. Anyway, I must say the evening was boring and I tried to imagine what life would be like with a husband like him. I thought being in a relationship had its advantages like watching something you enjoy together and critiquing it as a team? I guess I was wrong about that too!

The Biker left my crib at about midnight and I can't say I regretted him leaving. Today, i feel the least interested in matters of the heart and can't wait for the next big excitement to come. I only pray it comes soon.

Two-timing gone bad

Yesterday was a challenging day for me. I deliberately refused to commit my evening to anyone and decided that the first person to call with the prospect of spending time with me would be granted the honours. As luck would have it, Q made the first call. I readily agreed to go for a drink with him but promised to pick him up after I was done with work. I then made a call to the Biker and told him that I was not going to be free until about 9.00pm.

On reaching Q's work place, we were both plagued with indecision over where we should go. He made the suggestion to hang at a bar near my crib. To me, this translated into a long night with me at home. I was not prepared to take the risk of the biker finding us so i suggested that we go a bar called "The Office" in the Kamwokya ghetto instead.

We enjoyed a somewhat quiet evening and decided to switch phones for some peculiar reason. I realised on putting my sim cards in Q's phone that his messages were saved on the phone and not the sim card. In order to save a desperate situation, i brought this fact to his attention and we exchanged phones for a while. I was then able to remove any incriminating data from my phone. While he was fidegeting with his handset that at the time bore my sim cards, the Biker went on a sudden SMS spree. Q got curious after the third message and asked who the Biker was. This was after he mistakenly read one of the messages in which the Biker asked that I should let him know when I got home so he could pass by. I downplayed the Biker's importance in my life by telling Q that he was an acquaintance i'd recently met.

After that flimsly excuse, i guess it was jealousy that made Q refuse to listen to any of my excuses about my need to return home early. I was forced to ignore my heart and decided to stay on to keep Q happy. By the time i got home, the Biker was nolonger interested in visiting me. This I can confirm by the fact that he has not called me today. Since I've just had lunch with Q, I couldn't care less about the Biker's silence but i hope he is over his anger by evening.

The morning after

Before you get all excited, I'm not talking about the morning after pill. The issue here is the morning after great sex. I begun to understand how people with female bosses know exactly when to ask for a raise and get it. Reason, yesterday everyone in my office was able to guess that I'd had great sex the previous day.

The thing about great sex is that you are left with a feeling of euphoria for a long time. I had sex on my mind as i went about my chores yesterday and my mood betold of the same. It was while i was still experiencing this natural high that i got home and decided to cook the Biker a hot supper just to prolong the inevitable. Amazingly, being domesticated does feel nice sometimes! I guess it stems out of watching someone enjoy a meal that you've cooked.

After dinner we moved to the bedroom to prepare for our daily shower ritual but never made it past the door. The feeling of euphoria was still with me and it was foreplay enough. In a short while, the Biker and I were groping each other and in a record three minutes, I'd climaxed to the western jazz! What surprised me was the fact that I've never liked that partiular style. With the Biker, the ideal position has always been one of those complex greek angles like theta but this time, my body needed the least amount of prompting. I guess its the idea of being touched by one guy while your mind is still savouring the memories of another's touch.

To be honest, I'm loving this life and have no intentions to stop soon.

Retracing a ninja's footsteps

Following my earlier communication to the Biker, I decided to break free from his clutches so as to make myself available for anything that may come up over the weekend. With a few days to CHOGM, I found myself working late on Fridy night but finally went home to the Biker. In the morning I let him know that I would be at work for most of my day. I retruned home at about 5.00pm and cooked a sumptuos dinner which i shared with K. I deliberately ignored his sexual advances and limited all his movements to my living room. He left my house a disappointed man at about 10.00pm.

On Sunday, I woke up early to go to church to witness my niece's baptism. I was charged with putting things together for the afternoon party at Kembabazi's. On arrival, i received a call from Q wanting to invite himself for lunch at my house. Common sense and tradition helped me interprete this as a booty call since being in the confines of my house with Q has always resulted into one thing. I made my apologies and promised to drop by his place after my party.

Being the MC at this event meant that I had to rush through all the formalities like cake-cutting and presenting the new christian with gifts. At the first sign of nimbus clouds, I made a quick dash for my ride and told all guests that I had to seek adequate shelter before the skies opened up.

I got to Q's crib but to my chagrin, I found his cousin visiting. I tried to contain my imaptience by reminding the football crazy cousin that there was a big match coming up that he didn't need to miss. On my cue, the cousin bolted leaving us alone in the living room. Q hurriedly drew the curtains and like a budding flower reaches out for sunshine, we reached for each other and devoured ourselves senseless. We kept telling each other how much we'd missed ourselves. I am now a strong believer in the english adage that "a new broom sweeps well but an old one knows all the corners."

I'm back after a long hiatus!

After this sojourn, I'm compelled to apologise for the unexplained silence but it was mainly due to the fact that my schedule had suddenly gotten so tight leaving me with no time to attend to my blogging duties.

Anyways, I'll let bygones be bygones and continue living life to the fullest. I guess the break has also helped me to come to terms with my true self. In the last two weeks, I was able to recollect my thoughts and to tune my emotions back to the place I've always wanted them to be. The reality of how much i'd changed was spelt out for me by a good friend, Barbra who expressed shock at the fact that the word boyfriend had suddenly crept into my vocabulary.

Now that the work that was keeping me very occupied is finished, I've set my sights on reconnecting with all my beaus, Q especially. I was out for a drink with him two nights ago and he told me in no uncertain terms that he expects to reclaim his "full rights" to me now that I have no other excuse.

This revelation led me to break it down gently to the Biker . I can't say he took this news too well but I was glad that my truthfulness about the situation with Q helped me avoid having to tell many lies.

Lets see how these changes will affect the players in this drama.

Make-up sex

Forgiveness for me is one of the simplest things in life because my personal belief is that a repentant soul clearly deserves forgiveness and yields happier fulfilling moments. I went through a very trying day with no calls from the Biker and was disturbed by his silence. It was when I was about to give up on him that he remembered to send me a text message like nothing had gone wrong. I was still trying to make up my mind about whether or not to reply when he called. I couldn't hide the chill in my voice and I said I would meet him after I left work.

I was still feeling low when i got home but he was already waiting for me. I almost broke down trying to explain to him what exactky my suspicions had been about his actions. The Biker got down on his knees and begged me to forgive him. He swore from the bottom of his heart that he did not have any ill intentions. We spoke until the wee hours of the morning after showering separately for the first time since we begun seeing each other. It was akin to breaking an age-old family tradition whose impact was not lost on him.

I believe there is no bigger turn on than sex after a quarrel. I had to convince the Biker that I was wrestling my emotions to finally forgive him so i held out until the morning. I woke up feeling extremely horny and we went on to have the best sex ever. I guess it had alot to do with the fact that we involved our emotions but I can't wait for the next break up to make up.

Impeccable timing!

As i slowly nurse away my green-eyed monster, I can't help feeling lonely and regretting why I'd given so much of myself to a single soul. In the hope that the Biker might surprise me from his mysterious trip to the airport,I told off K in order to discourage him for dropping by my house last night. I now regret this decision because he usually does massage my ego when i'm feeling low.

I've however had my faith restored and now believe in the saying that the lord works in mysterious ways. This morning I got one of the most beautiful messages from my ex in Bagdad. He promised to call me later and told me in the most elaborate terms how he intends to make an honest woman of me on his return. Is this God's way of sending me an angel when I'm low?

The green-eyed monster strikes

For the first time since I started living this fairytale with the Biker, I have never had any reason to worry and he has also been mindful to keep me happy. He has on previous occasions found himself apologising for a crime he doesn't know because I'm upset. For some reason today, I can't shake the feeling that I've been lied to by non other than the Biker.

Since we started seeing each other, we have been honest about where we'll be if we are not together; atleast he has. Besides, he always knows where I'll be even if its not the truth. Anyway, after it had rained on me on Monday night, I was trying to extract some of the Biker's body heat so we held each other tightly in our Adam's suits.

It was in this moment that the Biker regrettably told me that he would not be ble to see me the following evening since he had to pick someone from the airport. I saw no reason to push it by asking for details so I just let it be. However, ti was while he was at the airport that I called him and he mumbled something about calling us guys when he got to town later on. I waited for his call but received a message at about midnight informing me of how tired he was and how he was already home. I tried to call him back instantly but to my surprise, his phone was unavailable. For all the time I've known him, he's never switched off his phone. Tell, me I'm I over-reacting or do I have reason to worry?

Formulating a routine

Its been a while since i last updated my blog but for me the reasons vary from the lack of time to the uncertainity about what I can and cannot share with everyone. Since i promised my self to be absolutely honest and open about what I include on my blog, I'm obliged to share everything so that I can benefit from the advise from each one of you.

Since my last update, Ive fallen into a systematic routine with the Biker in which we play housemates and exist in our little world of make-believe. Its amazing to note that even without making the suggestions, I have found myself changing towards a new me that enjoys nights in with or without alcoholic beverages! By nature, I am a bar hopper who thought that a day without a beer would be destructive to my being. Since the Biker doesn't drink and since we spend every evening in each other's company, i have found myself foregoing alcohol for life's simpler pleasures like ice cream and hot chocolate.

The other players in my life's drama simply cannot make sense of the changes they are witnessing. Q has convinced himself that I must be extremely busy and thus the absence. As for K, he showed up at my office the other day with a ridiculous idea that we should move in together. Out of respect for his originality, I downplayed the weight of the gesture and advised him to look for a new place of abode closer to my home so that we could spend less time apart. Being the enthusiast that he is, he left elated by the thought and has since reliably informed me that a house hunt is on in areas around my neighbourhood.

Seeing as this is yet another weekend, we are playing housemates with the Biker until Sunday night when he sadly has to sleep at his house. Personally, I'm addicted to my bed and would not envisage a night away from it unless i'm out of town. Yes, this should tell you that I've not spent a night in the Biker's lair and have no immediate plans to. However, I'm loving the fact that on week days, we bathe together and spend atleast two hours locked in a tight embrace until it dawns on us that he should probably be heading home. The sex is still amazingly great and there's nothing more I would wish for right now.

Confessions

Just when I thought there was going to be no way out, I got some information that lessened my guilt tremendously. I confessed to the Biker about my relationship with Q and told him that although it is obviously going no where, we share a special bond that just cannot be broken. Luckily for me, he also had some skeletons in his closet which made me feel better about myself. Apparently, the Biker has been in this stable relationship with a lady whose name ironically differs from mine only on the last letter.

This knowledge has helped me put my feelings into perspective since I was beginning to feel like i belonged. Anyway, the huge dilema is that much as i still care for Q, I know I like the Biker more. For a guy who is in a steady relationship, it puzzles me when he introduces me to his kin and folk as his girlfriend. He also says he wants me to introduce him to my pals as my boyfriend. I've driven a man to the point of utter confusion. He continuously tells me he sees the woman he wants to settle down with in me. I am definately not ready to settle down but i get really flattered when he syas these things to me.

Breaking the fast

As I'd predicted, my week was rather boring. Atleast for the first four days. Luckily for me, this chao fast ended on Thursday night. When presented with my first "meal", i dug into his body with a hunger that betold of my starvation. The Biker rose to the challenge and filled me up like a dry sponge that finally receives its first water. I think the wait was worth it basing on the levels of pleasure i managed to achieve.

Anyways, since Friday was a public holiday, I spent the whole weekend playing housemates with the Biker. I must admit that I liked his attentiveness. He praised my cooking and looked like he truly found my company pleasureable even when we were not busy doing the deed. This makes me wonder, I'm I falling for the Biker?

Shit! Its that time of the month

This week starts the worst days of my month. Reason? I'll be forced to go without sex for at least four days, and this is not by choice either! All of us have at least one or more addictions regardless of how holy we may feel. For many, its alcohol, cigarettes, work and or sex. Mine i'll admit is SEX. I consider it a punishment from God to go sexless for any number of days and worst still when its not by choice.

This goes to confirm what a dull week awaits me. Anyways, this terrible curse and the fact that I'll be extremely busy with work this week means I'll spend less time with all my beaus. I already feel the strain from not exercising. I've now made up my mind to drink, live and let die this week. Adieu

Data recovery and more!!!!

If you'd told yesterday that I'd enjoy some of the best sex of my life with the Biker I'd have called you mad. This is mainly because of the traumatising experience I'd had the other night. Okay, he was not yet aroused but still, I'd have thought the stuff would be bigger than what I saw.

With that vision that left me traumatised on Thursday night, I avoided seeing the Biker in my house until I was tipsy. I suggested that since it was a friday night, we should meet at a bar in Bugolobi. Anyways, it was fun hanging out with him and by the time I'd had my forth beer, the vision of his bits was blurred. We headed to my house and spent the night locked in a tight embrace. I made sure that my eyes don't stray to his center in case the trauma happens again.

This morning I woke up feeling very horny and started communicating this with my hands and legs. Luckily by the time I reached out to touch his bits, they'd grown to a sizeable shape. The rubber he wore only enhanced his size and increased my anticipation. We had two blissful sessions that left me wondering whether my mind had been playing tricks on me on Thursday night. Right now i feel revitalised and I have managed to recover most of the lost data. I feel very energised and productive. Hell, my boss was even happy to see me!

Of missing data files

Yesterday was not a good day for me primarily because I lost the most important file at our office. The incident made my boss storm out of office in a rage. Today, he's barely talking to me and yet the data recovery software that has been installed on my PC has not yielded any results.

It was in such low spirits that I went home home yesterday. I'd earlier planned a movie date with the Biker. (Its imporatnt to note that while at home, I prefer to watch movies while lying on my bed). Thinking that it was like all other home movie dates, the Biker stripped to his boxers on getting to my bedroom. I was momentarily taken aback since loving was the last thing on my mind. He should have gotten the hint considering that I was fully dressed. Anyway, I played along and allowed him to caress me. I was however not receptive. Like had happened to my computer, when i rebooted my system (refocused my thoughts to the issue at hand), i failed to elicit any reaction. I tried a data recovery from all my drives - mind, heart and body but my PC had suffered a more severe memory loss than i'd anticipated.

I could have played along abit more but the Biker commited the ultimate sin of shedding the last bit of clothing he had on him. I am still hoping that my cold reaction had a lot to do with the size of his central bits. In that one moment, my whole future flashed before me and i wondered if I could commit myself to a life that seemingly offered little in terms of physical pleasure. I was alrmed and panicked and i've been trying to erase the vision from my memory in vain. I told the Biker I'd been badly affected by the loss of my file and he readily understood when I added that I needed to be alone. I am now in this place where I know I like the Biker but I'm afraid of the size of his bits. I'm I being too selfish?

A weekend of Multi-tasking

One of the prime attributes for my job is the ability to multitask and work long hours. My job demanded these two of me over the weekend. I applied the experience I've got on this job in my love life in order to create a semblance of normalcy and balance over the weekend.

After waking up with the Biker, I reached the office late to the chagrin of my boss. I had to make a quick dash for lunch with Q shortly afterwards since according to him, I'd had an early night so there was no reason as to why I should be late for work. After he was assured that all was well with me, I had to make up for lost time at the office. I therefore spent the best part of my Saturday tied up in work until the wee hours of Sunday morning (4.30am). Luckily, the Biker picked me up and dropped me off at home. Seeing as the night was almost over, I asked him to stay over. We woke up at midday and i remembered that I was scheduled to go to Q's house for lunch. I made a quickie excuse about seeing my sister which got the Biker to leave. I headed to Q's crib and after a sumptuos Sundy lunch, fell asleep on his settee while attempting to watch a movie.

I woke up just in time to for the Big Brother eviction party where I had arranged to meet K to make up for the lost time on Friday night. I told Q I couldn't go with him since he had no invite. On reaching Faze 2, K was not absolutely convinced with Friday's explanation about my battery running low but like i'd predicted, a little charm was all it took to get him back under my wing. He was coming down with a cold that helped me shorten my evening. After the boring eviction night, I headed straight home to call it a night. However before i slept, I received a goodnight call from the Biker advising me to dream about him.

The Biker returns

The long drought since the Biker left town was finally broken on Friday evening. The anticipation mounted with each update informing me that they'd reached Mbarara, the equator and finally town. Before he told me that they had cut their trip short, I had taken out insurance and planned a date with one of my needy special friends that i'll call K. Now K is exciting to hang out with but for only the briefest of times because I can't say I particularly enjoy talking to him. Even making small talk with him is like watching paint dry! Anyway, what he lacks in conversational skills, he makes up for in bed.

Much as I was faced with the dilema of letting down K gentl, I found myself resorting to the uncouth choice of making my cellphone unavailable. I thought I could squeeze him into my tight schedule before I retired to a night of bliss with the Biker but because he had not seen me for a while, he kept calling to remind me of our date. I therefore made the choice to keep the Biker happy since I knew K would forgive me for any indiscretions within two minutes of turning on my charm at our next meeting.

On getting home in my palpable excitement, I reached out to hug the Biker and in that one moment, realised that probably, he is too short for me. His obvious manifestations of love and affection quickly helped me to forget that rather disturbing detail. We then embarked on an exciting journey in which we explored each other's bodies. I must salute the Biker for helping me discover certain points of pleasure that I never knew I possessed. Armed with this new information, I know that only the sky is my limit.

Does absence really make the heart grow fonder??????

I am forced to ask what the person who coined the saying "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" was smoking. I know I am a unique human being in several aspects but I do not conform to the above saying. It will be a week tomorrow since the Biker left town but already, I have been tempted to "google" through my little black book for someone to temporarily fill the void. I know he returns to town on Saturday night but the emptiness I felt after I saw him off has worn off at the speed of light! This, I know is contradictory to what I told you earlier but he's absence has helped me realise that theres more to life than a sensual foot massage.

I'm not sure this decision to revert to my little black book would have been easier made had it not been for the contant messages that a few of my special friends have plagued my inbox with. I must give it to them for their impeccable timing. I was starting to get tired of hearing Q go on and on about what a great time we shared last Sunday and was beginning to look for the ultimate thrill of the week.

As it seems, I've not reached the desperate point where my body makes demands that cause me to throw all caution to the wind. Since today is Thursday, let me see how much longer I can hold off the raw urge to indulge. Till then, I remain yours, Big Mama

Bring on the birthday blues!

Today is Q's birthday. I just bought him the most thoughtful gift that he has always wished for. His excitement was contagious and it filled me with a warmth and joy that only comes from giving. Seeing as we are both busy, he has organised a drink-up at his crib over the weekend. I can't wait to hit his party. The only trouble is, he's failed to commit to a particular date. I'm pushing him to make it on Friday since on Saturday I'll be at the Jonathan Butler concert while Sunday absolutely doesn't work for me. Reason, the Biker returns to town that day. The excitement i'm feeling can only be compared to a coward's first bungy jump.

The Ex called from Bagdad to say he was thinking about me lately. For some reason, his call did not excite me that much even if he made a huge effort to continuously flatter me. If i didn't know better, I'd think traditional punctuation had totally run out of style judging from his constant flow of endearments. He still refuses to say when he'll be back saying he wants to surprise me. Well, lets hope he doesn't surprise himself instead.

Conflicting Feelings

Okay, i'm not sure how i got to this place but since the biker came into my life, I've been totally confused that i don't know what i want anymore. He's currently on this long distance ride to Burundi with other bikers to raise funds for some orphans. Since he's been gone, I'm not sure my life has meaning until the time he calls which is usually at the end of his day.

It was during one of these low moments that Q called yesterday begging to see me. I could tell from his voice that he was extremely horny. Well, considering that i've been off the circuit for a while, i decided to test my will power. I got to his home at about 6.00pm and he had made us a very tasty meal. He then put on a romantic movie and cuddled up next to me. When he started caressing me i could'nt hold it much longer. Before i knew it, we were kissing and lost all track of the movie. One thing led to another but while he was ravishing me, my phone rang. (I've got the loudest ringtone that can even wake the dead). Anyway i ignored the phone but while basking in the aftermath of our sin, i decided to reach for the phone to see who was calling me. Well, as bad luck goes, it was the biker who had opted to send me a text message instead about how much he missed me and how he couldn't wait to see me. Most people in my position would have felt ashamed but for me, i felt excitement instead. Its the excitement of doing the forbidden that i find so irresistable. Call me crazy but its what gets my juices running.

Anyways, the biker confessed just before he left that he's extremely jealous. He therefore called me up with several questions about what i'd been up to. Being the ninja that i am, i came up with a satisfying answer but today, i've been plagued with calls from Q who hasn't stopped expressing his fulfilment with my performance last night.

I'll wait to hear from the Biker but in the meantime, Q is waiting to see me. Cheers

The First Kiss

I must start by apologising for all the time i've spent without posting but blame it on the ISP. Just to take you back to that last day, i went out with the regular guy whom i shall call Q and spent a wonderful four hours getting wasted. On getting home however, i found that i couldnt shake the temptation to talk to the biker. As fate would have it, just as i reached for my phone, he called and we got into this wild long conversation that was spiced with innuendo about what we will do to each other at our next meeting.

Anyways, the night passed blissfully and i woke up the next day faced with the prospect of yet a more intriguing day. I must confess that friday was not that eventful for me mainly because of the stress from work. I simply planned to spend a quiet evening watching movies with my dearest little sister who was yet to return to school. The biker joined us for the movie night and it was delightful having him massage my feet as the movie rolled.

I next saw the biker on Sunday when we rode together along the Mbarara highway while taking my sister to school. I immensely enjoyed the experience and my spirits were high when we got back to town. We hit the Big Brother eviction party and proceeded home to rest.

It was on Monday night that we shared our first kiss. To say the wait was worth it would be an understatement. It begun in the guise of a massage to ease my tension but resulted into an intimate session that promised lots of pleasure in the future. I think the thing that stood out most was his sensitvity and the way he respected my boundaries.

Its raining men!

Today is one of those days that I get to ponder upon the difficult question that is my future. To understand my dilema, one has to first understand my life. I have a phobia for commitment which makes me run at the first sign of a guy who is here to stay. I sometimes wonder who it will be that will catch me in flight.

I am still having a heavy long distance thing going on with my ex who is currently in Bagdad. Along with him is this other guy that i've been "seeing" on and off for the last four years. (Even before my ex really became an ex!). As if this this isn't bad enough, i sometimes spend a rather exciting time with some special friends whom i see only when i fight with the first two.

Anyways, recently i added one other friend who has exhibited potential of getting to be more than just a friend (The biker). Today for some reason, the ex called asking after me, the regular guy called wanting to see me this evening, the biker and I (God bless him!); has fallen into this routine where we see each other every after work and one of my special friends was simply checking on me. Whom should i see tonight? I neither want to change this beautiful pattern with the biker nor do I feel ready to let go of my regular guy with whom i'd kind of developed this pattern before saying I had suddenly gotten busy with work.

Confusion raging

A week ago, i met the most exciting biker and i thought we had made a connection. He spoke well, responded correctly and was generally nice. Only trouble is, we are so different yet so alike. A week has gone by with a couple of dates which i must say is a record for me but the only trouble is that much as i feel the chemistry, we've barely touched.

Traditionally, my relationships have not followed convention. First we get physical then get to know each other better. This time, i'm playing hard ball. How do people interact for so long when theres an obvious attraction and don't get tempted to touch? We'll let me sit this one out and see what happens after two weeks!